Wow, I didn't realise I'd dropped off the radar for that long.

This all consuming life of small business and children continues to swallow us up. But things are improving. We are almost fully staffed in the bakery now, and everyone seems to be chugging along happily.

We took a week to do some maintenance and recover ourselves before the next big onslaught. A well deserved break away from thinking non-stop about our business. But now there is fall out about that time away. I'm dealing with customers who may be lost, who were angry about not being able to get bread for a week and want us to know it. Even though I gave them notice, verbal and written.

Will I always be a slave to these customers? When will I be master of my own destiny? Is this the capitalist punishment? Subject to the whims of the market and forever on edge? Feeling like we could never close again for fear of our livelihood? What are the alternatives?

Before I forget them, this is my list of the joys of having a week off:

-all the boys in the big bed, wriggling, jiggling and giggling while I growl and grumble

-family breakfasts of 'dippy eggs' and endless piles of toast and jam, with kids playing cars around the kitchen table.

-tickles and giggling and not having the tele on at all because we are so busy playing and running and reading and doing, together.

-dozy, snoozy afternoons, hot milo and bikkies.

-being able to talk to each other all day and all night.

-going to dinner at a friends restaurant and tasting the love in the food.

-remembering that we love food too, and there is a reason we are doing all this.

-being so thrilled and rested and inspired after a week off, I baked a gateau basque and it was beautiful.

I'll be back again, sooner than last time....