Dear, beloved friends, you have been so patient with me, while so much has happened here...

This month we bought a house! As I moaned earlier, this is a long process, where decisions must be made quickly, but the time between decisions is fraught with worry. That is all over now, and we are heading towards settlement, trying to choose carpet and paint colours for a home we have seen twice.

It's great though, a big step towards our other goal, of owning our own business. Brilliant.

Meanwhile, it has come to pass that we are also expecting our second baby! Very exciting. It explains why I found decision making so difficult the past few weeks and why I've been feeling nauseous every afternoon at 4pm. So onward and upward to November. We'll be well settled in our new home, freshly painted and carpeted, summer seedlings established by the time the new little one is here. Although saying that now makes me feel exhausted. So much to do!

Our savings plan is under heavy, heavy scrutiny, since we will shortly be back to one income.
Also, owning a house has brought along a new world of expenses to consider, and it seems that everyone wants money from us. My biggest bugbear at present is insurance. They prey on your worst nightmares and then find a way to really hurt you. Get this- one policy will pay you an amount if you get a serious illness, but this payment renders your life insurance void. So if (ahem, when) you die, your family will not be entitled to a lump sum payment, since you already received one while you were alive. But, there is a buy-back option, where you can opt to buy back your 'death' insurance, in the event of having cashed-out on the serious illness policy. Thoughtful, no? It's a really ugly business. I have encountered a lot of sheepish looking sales people, peeping guiltily out from under dropped eyes. They know it's bad too!

We are doing our utmost to avoid and minimise new expenses, without being foolish, but there's not much room to move now. Our repayments are managable, just, and we need to use this time with two incomes and no mortgage to get a bit of cash stashed for later. It's tricky, because I find myself tempted into spending by thinking 'Oh, soon we won't be able to do this at all..'. Self sabotaging must end.

Now that my energy is level and my stomach sits steadily, my savings enthusiasm has returned also. I am very aware that this will only be for the next three months, and I'll be making the most of that too. The investigating I have to do over the next months (I hope) will be useful for everyone. Now that we're moving with reasonable notice, I can properly check out telephone, gas, electricity and internet providers and set us up with a good deal. Movers, decorators, conveyancers, insurers will all be needed and utilised with minimum expense to us. I hope!

Achievable vs Sustainable

I have a personal philosophy concerning change. I have been thinking about it since recently a couple of my friends have embarked on life changing projects that are spectacular and dramatic. And so have we, with this savings project.

My philosophy came about few years ago, when the baker and I embarked on a weight loss program, let's call it WW. We did brilliantly and still maintain ourselves around the old landmines of Christmas, Easter, birthdays and such. But we worked hard. You had to do a lot of thinking and planning. You had to make some choices and changes that would be there forever. It wasn't a short term stint, we followed that program for more than 12 months.

To successfully complete the program, you do six weeks of 'maintenance', where you work out how to stop losing weight and live 'normally' again. About half way through our journey I found myself using this finishing point as a motivator. Like 'Ohh, I'm going to have butter on my toast again when I get to maintenance,' and 'Ohh, I'm going to have 60gms of cereal when I'm on maintenance,'. Then one day the leader suggested that I add up all those things that I was going to go back to eating on maintenance, and see if I could do those things while successfully maintaining my weight. I would not.

I had to look again at what I was doing everyday, the choices that I'd made that I wasn't intending on continuing with. And I had to think again about what I could do, as opposed to what I would do. My choices had to be achievable, and sustainable. I could live without buttered toast, but I wouldn't. I had to choose something else.

Thus my philosophy was born. Achievable vs sustainable. I find myself living this way again with our savings plan. We certainly do without many, many things, but what about later? What are we just going to go back to buying, having, using? And what are we using, having, buying now without even thinking about? Are we denying ourselves some things and mindlessly consuming others? The powdered milk episode is a perfect example. I can use it, I did use it for a few weeks, but now I don't. I don't like it. So I'm back buying regular milk and looking for alternative product substitutes.

I had to think about my philosophy as I shopped at our local, huge supermarket for the first time in months. I didn't have the time or energy to go to Aldi, so, list in hand, budget in wallet, I hit the shiny, tempting-product laden aisles of the megamarket.

I did well. Very few branded items, nothing other than what was on the list and within budget. I saw aisles and aisles of things we don't use or need, and I saw what I buy week in, week out. I realised that shopping at Aldi has re-trained me, and I know what we need. I also noticed that there's very few things I'm leaving out or missing on the weekly shop, which is good. A sign of sustainable changes.

I hope a burst of my philosophy helps my dear friends who are facing similar choices to reach their own goals. Can you see yourself doing this in a month, by Christmas, next year? Will you still be doing it then? Will you be able to? Check back. The end goal is a massive motivator, but if the way you're living now isn't a part of the end result, you will find yourself doing this over, and over again. Change is hard, change is challenging. The hardest part is to stop fooling yourself that you've made a change when you haven't.

To my more paranoid friends- the last paragraph is not directed at anyone specific. The 'you' isn't necessarily you, I could mean me, not you. You are all brilliant and I am ever supportive of all your endeavours.

kickbacks

And there I was whinging about the cost of health cover!

Those of you completely disinterested in health insurance will have no idea that presently my health fund is being bought out by a larger, British based health fund. And to encourage the members to go along with it, they're offering cash payments to smooth the way. Woo-hoo!

I'm sure there are lawyers and such who would be horrified by my statement. I'm sure it's much more complex than that. If I'd really read the fine print I may be upset about the takeover, but all I saw was the four figures at the top of the statement letter and where to put my bank details. I'm so easily bought off. But an unexpected windfall is a brilliant way to start the week. It always seemed to me that this kind of thing happened to other people. This time, it's us. Hooray!